Thursday, Dec. 25 – There’s quiet Christmas music playing, and I’m crying again. I’m playing one of my favorite Xmas CD’s, this one song is “I’ll Be Home For Christmas”. Every word punctuates the air with sadness. Marc and I were so involved in music, how can this love of ours be so painful now?! You’re supposed to be so happy this time of year, what kind of future is in store?! He should be walking in the room to share the song with me!
But I’m not really complaining as he and I got an early Christmas gift. The defendant in his case won’t be allowed to post bail!
The Hearing last Monday seemed like a trial! They went over all kinds of (gruesome) facts. There were slides of weapons found in the boys backpacks, slides of the street marked off, the 7-11 store where all three had met. One of the Detectives gave his testimony. I sorta listened to what the D.A. was asking and then decided if I could stand the answer or not? If it was too painful, I closed my eyes and plugged my ears. I was not able to bear all the sordid details, even tho I’ve spent sleepless nights wondering over and over in my mind about all the possible scenarios of the incident. I’d learned enough facts online, so I was not so isolated from info on the crime.
In the end the Judge said she did not see any reason after hearing the facts to allow the defendant to be able to post bail. The main issue for me this trip was …. ‘do we have the right guy’? Secondly, he shouldn’t be allowed to post bail after Marc was murdered like he was. He may flee and that would just prolong our suffering and the justice I dearly wanted.
So, to me, we got the best gift ever this Christmas. Amidst the holiday cheer and my painful loss is real joy and gratitude because the justice system is working in our favor so far. It was as good as Santa coming down the chimney just for me alone!
God hears prayers!