When you go thru such a terrible loss, alot of people have flashbacks to the distant past or the actual incident. It’s the same with me. My mind and heart pour over life incidents from every age. It’s hard to deal with some recall, it’s still too painful to share. But the good memories, the…
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No Wasted Words
I have no interest in sharing about Marc’s accomplishments …. it’s just not the world he or I dwelled in. What kind of job he had, how creative or funny he might have been…. any awards or certificates he may have had …. what do they mean now? What are they worth in eternal terms?…
Limbo
A family goes thru various phases when dealing with a murder case. For couple months we’ve been in a ‘limbo’ stage, waiting for perhaps one or both defendants to enter a plea as vs. their going to trial, and facing a jury. Been very quiet from the defendants and I’m told that’s the norm in…
Another Holiday Passes
Easter (Passover) – On many levels Marc was a consumate friend as well as son. Every day I tell God how grateful I am for having had the experience of knowing such a wonderful person, great son and friend! Marc was so trustworthy, I always felt safe with him. He’s never tried to use or…
Never Alone
The thing that happened to Marc is still so unbelievably horrible! Every day I have times when I just cannot believe it happened! But each day I also find more love from others out there, more about the case, or God’s plan for me during all this. My whole understanding of life will never be the same…
Truth in Mourning
As I mourned for my son Marc, I tried to be honest about how I grieved. I knew if I didn’t deal in reality about my loss, if I hated the defendants or developed fear about death or the murderer… I’d be a “goner.” I’d end up half alive, (or half dead.) I could visualize…
Texting to Heaven
Soon after Marc left this earth I started wondering what mode of communication we were having? It just seemed so natural to be able to freely talk to him whenever I wanted, and really ‘know’ he was listening to me. The best mode I can relate to would be that I’m sending Marc a text…
I Wish
It’s been rather quiet legally re: Marc’s case. I have a ‘victims advocate’ who is a big help with general questions, issues. I’m not at liberty to share much at all about the defendants or the proceedings until things are finalized in the court. Basically, it’s a waiting game for the defendants to decide to enter…
Painful Topics
All thru this loss of Marc I’ve wondered what to share. I’ve observed the ways others handled their grief. In the past few years I’ve watched ‘Dateline’ or ’48 Hours’ on TV and noticed how people deal with their loved ones being murdered. I’ve seen deep anguish, outrage and silent suffering. I’ve watched Christians on TV…
Remembering Marc
It’s been a blessing to have people share about Marc these last four months. Their words will stay in my heart forever. It’s like each of them has been able to see inside Marc’s heart or character and seen some of what I’ve known to be true all these years. Two weeks ago I needed to…